I DON’T KNOW WHAT TO TITLE THIS SO JUST READ IT IF YOU WANT

Dear Reader,

This week has truly been one of the worst of my life. I know that sounds extremely dramatic, and may be troubling to hear, but in all honesty my life has not been terrible. I haven’t had to endure many tragedies or go through anything too awful (that I can think of, at least–unless I’m just repressing some things), so understand that this is all relative.

That being said, this week I have been more tired and stressed than I have ever been before (I kid you not–I fell asleep writing a paper and when I woke up there were some very confusing sentences that lead me to believe that I actually wrote part of it in my sleep). I’ve never felt worse about myself and I’ve never been so close to a nervous breakdown for so long. Everything just seems to build up and, though I’ve let some of it out, I know it’s only a matter of time before something truly pushes me over the edge and I burst.

Now, these are just the lows. I’ve felt this low for a majority of the week, but I’ve also had some highs. I’ve had some wonderful moments this week and I’ve truly laughed much more than usual.

I guess what I’m saying is that this whole week has been one big, draining, emotional roller coaster. But that’s college I suppose.

I promise I do have a point for writing this, though. Something that all of this has done is inspired me to write. I started off the week writing more than usual (just on small projects and my working novels and things like that), but when finals week started approaching faster and faster, I had to put it all on pause. Since then, I’ve had more inspiration than I know what to do with. Everything either reminds me of a character from my book or a potential blog post or a change I could make in my lyric essay. And it’s been really hard not to give in, even though I really don’t have the time to.

So, what I’ve decided to announce, is that I think I’m going to start sharing some of my writing. I don’t know how much within the next week, considering I still have finals to worry about, but I’m going to start putting myself out there. First, probably, with stupid little thoughts I decide to fashion into something creative, but then maybe some personal essays or memoir-type writings and things like that.

Because, honestly, that’s why my blog exists. I’m just writing whatever comes to mind, sharing anything I like, and interacting with people just like me. And people much different from me.

I’m just kind of going in whatever direction I feel like, and this is how I feel right now. And  I just thought I’d let anyone know that wanted to, because this is something I’ve very much looking forward to.

Sincerely,

Sammy

PS. Song of the moment for me is Yellow Flicker Beat by Lorde. It’s from the Mockingjay soundtrack and it’s really hard to listen to without singing along.

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Day 21: Thank YOU!!!

Dear Reader,

Yes, I know, this is super corny to be ending my “21 days of thanks” by thanking you, the reader! But I need to. So just bear with me.

I started this blog almost six months ago because I was bored. And because my life was boring. I literally started out by saying: I have nothing to write about because nothing exciting ever happens to me. Maybe that’ll change if I start writing to random people on the internet.

Well that didn’t happen. Nothing remarkable has happened to me yet because of this, and honestly, none of my posts have been amazing. I haven’t really told any cool stories or had any crazy encounters since starting out on wordpress, but I’ve found something more.

WordPress is a place where I can turn to now. I feel like I actually know some of the people on here. I feel like they actually care. Every like and comment makes me feel better–makes me feel like a part of this community. And I’m so thankful to be here.

Now, I’m nowhere near internet fame (not that I ever intend to be), but this month I hit 100 followers. 100 people get notified, in a sense, when I decide to use this website as an outlet. Because of this website, my voice can be heard–or, at least, I can feel like I’m being heard. Which is more than I could ask for.

I’ve been talking about inspiration a lot these past 21 days. It’s because I’m constantly being inspired by everything around me. My friends inspire me to be better, my teachers inspire me to be like them, my sister inspires me to be myself. John and Carrie inspire me to pursue my dreams and Disney inspires me to stay a kid.

Well WordPress inspires me to do more.

When I first started, I would just write and respond to comments and maybe look at a few posts here and there. This month, though, I’ve been reading. I’ve been learning about the people on here. And it’s wonderful.

I’m inspired to learn and travel and teach and give back and be with my family and make more friends and live. Every blog, every person, every post reminds me of all the other people on this planet who are doing things every day. Some typical, some extraordinary.

But I want to join.

I don’t know exactly what the future has in store for me, but I can say that I will be posting on here a lot more. But not daily. I’m done with the post-a-day technique and I can say that it’s not for me. After all, how am I going to get anything done if I spend each day on my computer?

But thank you. Thank you for reading this. Thank you for following me, if you do. Thank you for inspiring me.

I hope you stick around.

Sincerely,

Sammy

PS. Listen to this song: Dead Air – CHVRCHES