WHEN IN DOUBT, BLOG IT OUT (and thank you for 300!!!)

Dear Reader,

My friend tweeted that yesterday and I loved it. I really hesitate before posting certain entries on here if they’re about anything too serious or if I might come across in a not-too-flattering light. A lot of people I know in real life follow this blog and I never want to worry them with things I say on here, but I also don’t want to censor myself too much.

The truth of the matter is that I have been experiencing a lot of new emotions lately–or at least amplified emotions. I’ve been dealing with things that I’m not used to and I’ve even sought out therapy because of it. But, in all honesty, this is my therapy. This is the best therapy I have. Putting my thoughts down on (virtual) paper actually helps, and talking about it to people on the internet is surprisingly helpful.

And now there are 300 of you.

300 people have decided to follow this blog and get notified when I decide to try and work through these new thoughts and terrifying revelations I have. But I also share a lot of the good. Actually, I like to think that most of my blog posts are pretty upbeat and happy, or are things that I’m really excited to share.

Anyway, that’s why I wrote this post. Because when in doubt, I blog it out, and I’m really happy to have 300 people to share parts of my life with.

Have a happy Monday!





We all like to think that we’re destined for great things.

We all see our future as brighter than our present

and we long for the days to come

because we like to think that they’re better than the days we’re having now.

I mean

we certainly don’t think they’ll be worse.


How can they be worse?

But we look to the future with dumb optimism.

We see things better than reality

because we compare ourselves to people we can’t become.

We see ourselves as better than average.

We all do.

But that, in itself, is flawed.

We cannot all be above average.

It is impossible.

And I’m starting to realize

more and more

how unfortunately average I am.

And I don’t know how to be okay with it

because I was raised to believe I was better.


Dear Reader,

College is hard, you guys.

Before I went, people told me that classes were going to be difficult, but there are quite a few things that they didn’t disclaim. For example, I was under the impression that each of my classes would have an exam or two–maybe a project, maybe a paper–and those would make up the majority of my grade. Homework would no longer be a thing.

That is not correct.

I have nightly homework for each class, but only two of them don’t check. In three of my classes, I’m expected to read a few articles or a chapter or something, and then write a reflection or a summary or a notecard with a question on it–just to prove that I read it.

Oh and also, that’s what homework is now. Reading. So much reading. I have to read two to three articles every class for geography. I have to read chapters in my textbook for my journalism class and my media class and my rhetorical analysis class. I have to read Shakespeare for my Shakespeare class (obviously), and I have to read books, articles, graphic novels, and everything under the sun for my literacy class. Which makes sense.


But seriously, when I’m a teacher and kids are complaining about my class and asking why we have to read so much, I’ll just ask them: do you want to go to college? Because if yes, I don’t care what you’re majoring in, you’re going to be reading. I’ve talked to my friends in the business school and my friends who are pre-med and my friends in engineering and it’s all just reading.

Prepare yourself.

And then finally, midterm week isn’t a thing. Not really. And if it is a thing, it’s not the same for everyone. I thought last week was midterm week because I had a paper due in one class and an exam in another. Then I thought this week might be in because I had an actual midterm exam in one class and a project due in another. But now I’m pretty sure it’s next week because I have two exams and two projects due.

But that’s the thing: you don’t get one week of lots of work and then a week of break. You get work on top of work on top of work. And maybe it’s just because I’m taking six classes, but I think some of it also has to do with these teachers. I mean, we had a project due in one class and in that same class, we have an exam next week. And then I had a rhetoric exam on Monday, and he just assigned our next paper in the next class.

So, basically, I just had to vent. And sort of explain why I haven’t been writing blog posts or uploading videos. And also warn anyone who has a completely different idea of what college will be like. Because this is my reality, and I was not expecting of it.

Alright, well this was a nice 15-minute break, but I’m gonna go now. Get my nose back to the grindstone.

Is that something people still say?




Dear Reader,

That is the name of the article I’m featured in.

I posted a video a few days ago in which I voiced some concerns and opinions about the american school system. Shortly after, I got an email from a very nice lady named Paula who just so happens to be the associate editor at PJ Media. She then wrote a sweet article about me and posted it on her website.Screen Shot 2015-10-06 at 11.41.27 PM

When I went to bed last night, it had been shared 121 times and had just over 700 views. I’ve yet to check what it’s at now.

But I was lowkey freaking out yesterday when I began to realize what was happening. Now, it’s not like this video is going to go viral or anything, but it makes me kind of worried how many people are sharing it and how many Facebook and Twitter timelines it might be popping up on now. As I’ve said before, my blog and YouTube channel are relatively private. I know that posting content online runs the risk of having the whole world as a potential audience, but I figured I would never have to worry about that.

So now knowing that my parents or distant relatives or people form my high school could find out that sometimes I talk to myself in front of a camera and upload it for the world to see… well that’s kind of freaky.

Secondly, this audience that is viewing the video is very different. It’s not made up of the friendly faces that greet me when I log onto WordPress. It’s made up of educated, experienced, and opinionated adults. Many of whom have taught for years and have their own relative discourse when approaching this subject.

And here I am, a kid from Ohio, who thought “man, the price of college is annoying. Common core is annoying. You know what? The whole grade system is annoying!” And then I made a video.

Needless to say, some people didn’t take kindly to my “weird examples” and “ignorant questions,” and some of the things they said were just mean. My favorite exchange was this:

“She’s an intelligent, articulate young woman. But she won’t last as a teacher. I give her maybe five years.”

And then:

“I don’t find her to be intelligent and articulate. I find her to be a snarky smart ass who should be researching answers to her questions rather than pontificating on things as if she has some kind of great insight when she’s utterly clueless.”

But I still stand by everything I said and I’m actually learning a lot from this ruthless comment section. In fact, the meanest person (in my opinion) actually answered a lot of my questions. Now, he managed to get a few zingers in between them, but my questions have been answered. Thanks, bud.

So I thought I’d share this with you all because, hey, the article is actually really nice and I feel very well represented. Besides, I made this video to start this conversation, so isn’t it good that people are talking?

Or maybe I should just be more careful what I wish for.

Have a great day y’all!




Dear Reader,

If you didn’t already know, I’m an education major. And a few weeks ago in class, I started thinking about all the things that annoy me about the american school system. As it turns out, there’s a lot.

So, I wrote an open letter, then I read it out loud in front of a camera, and forgot to upload it for a few weeks.


But I’m sharing it now because sometimes it’s good to get things off your chest, you know? And let’s be honest–there’s plenty that can be fixed with our education system, and I’m not really seeing the progress I’m looking for.

So here’s a video of me reading a very abridged list of what worries me regarding the future of America and our school system. Enjoy if you want.